Some call love a curse, some call love a thief | Koe
For a moment he was hoping she’d love, actually feeling slightly disappointed that she didn’t. She should’ve. She could’ve spared a huge heartache because as he was listening to her words it was clear for him that nothing changed. He still wasn’t enough, not for her and he just wasted time with even thinking about them together. It wouldn’t happen and one part of him - with sound judgement - was happy about it, glad that he wouldn’t lose himself for her once again just to get fucked over. She was lethal, she was the death of him.
After moments of silence he nodded, eyes locked with hers. “I do need you.” Joe admitted because actually both of them knew it anyway. “And I do love you.” He stated, staring right into those criminally beautiful blue eyes you could get lost in. “That’s exactly the reason why a friendship would never last. I can’t be your friend while I feel like this so we better forget each other.” He blurted it out, finally getting rid of that burden. His expression remained neutral but his eyes went blank and sad, letting out a bitter laugh before he shook his head, feeling absolutely horrible. “You know what they say, it’s either nothing or everything.” Guess it just didn’t work out for them.
“Right.” Kristin shook her head, eyes falling to the ground. She should have known better. How could a friendship possibly last. She’d lost him, completely. No relationship. No friendship. It was over. Everything they had ever been was gone. Nothing remained. Not even the tiniest amount of friendship. He didn’t want it, he just made that perfectly clear and it hurt more then she could have ever imagined. “Okay.” She finally let out through a choked sob. “Okay.” She nodded to herself. “Guess this is goodbye then.” Kristin hesitated a moment before looking back to him, quickly. Her eyes shut tightly for a moment, almost trying to keep the vision of him alive, before she turned swiftly on her heel and slipped through the door.
Some call love a curse, some call love a thief | Koe
“What do you want me to say?” He asked as she leaned back, knowing it wasn’t going to end well. They were just sitting there, staring at each other without any words. It was so bitter that he started to frown, actually feeling exhausted, and just worn in general. Then she said the words, repeating how fucking fine she was for a few times before she could actually move, Joe following her every motion with his eyes. He wanted her to leave, his whole mind was screaming, wanting her out and away, just because it was smart enough to recognize danger.
He knew what hurt him so bad that he’d been left empty. After mere seconds she stood she was already walking towards the front door and Joe kept holding on until almost the last damn second. He took a sip of his booze and watched as she opened the door, actually thinking he’d be able to let her leave. But he wasn’t. “Why did you come here?” He asked, hoping his question would stop her, but knowing it would be better if not. He couldn’t help adding the last part. “Once in a fucking liftime, Kristin, be honest with me and tell me what’s on your mind.”
Kris grit her teeth and tightened her jaw before shutting the door slowly, listening to the soft click of the lock connecting with its home plate. Her fingers lingered on the door knob, her eyes just staring down at it as she thought to herself. She needed to leave, needed to open the door again and just leave. Yet? She didn’t. Instead she turned around and pushed back against the door, refusing to move back towards him. “I miss you.” Kristin admitted, eyes staring at him across the large space. “I came here because of your phone call. If you hadn’t called me..if you hadn’t..” She shook her head and let out a heavy sigh. “If you hadn’t told me you loved me, I wouldn’t be here. But you did and it made me think that we could work something out..even if it was a friendship.” Again she paused, tilting her head back against the door. “I love you, I always will. You tried to move on, I’m trying to move on. But I can’t just ignore the fact that you’re my best friend..you were my lover and my life..I can’t lose you completely…you can’t be my nothing.” Her eyes locked on his finally as she straightened. “I’ve been foolish and naive and selfish but..I need you and I’m smart enough to know you need me too.”
Some call love a curse, some call love a thief | Koe
“That was a mistake.” Joe muttered in silene, trying hard to keep his eyes off her but he just couldn’t. She was talking nonsense, saying things she shouldn’t have. And all that… Why? To make him feel even more ruined? Even more used up, run down, devastated? Because hella sure, she was getting closer to it. With every second she spent in that house she was making the situation worse.
Even her actions were to bitter to take, Joe just couldn’t return her smile because her touch was burning, she was too close, to damn cloose to bear it without going insane. He loved her, he loved her blindly, he was madly in love with her and it seemed he couldn’t get rid of that curse. “I do hate you.” Joe muttered, words sharp but tone soft. “At the end of the day, you’re just still hurting me. If I matter to you, you leave. That will be our closure.” They had no future, and so long they didn’t stand a chance, it was just a torture to have his hopes high up.
Kristin breathed in through gritted teeth. Her hands fell from his skin slowly and she leaned back, her eyes just staring at his own. She remained like that, just sitting there in silence and staring back at him for a few minutes. “Fine.” She grit out, ignoring how she felt. “Fine, Joseph. Fine.” Word of the day. Fine. I’m fine. Kristin avoided his gaze and let out a sigh before pushing from the couch. Moving back to the entrance of the lving room she bent and grabbed her jacket and the spare key, standing as she put on her jacket in silence. Without looking back at him or saying a thing she put the spare key on the entrance table before exiting from the living room and heading to the front door.
Some call love a curse, some call love a thief | Koe
“I called you because I’m drunk.” He pointed out, acting on it. Yes, he was slightly tipsy but the amount of booze he drank was far not enough to get him drunk - and he started drinking only after her called Kristin anyway. “And we both know while hammered we tend to make really bad decisions.” He finished, silencing himself as she started talking again. Damn, her touch upon his cheek was almost unbearable, even if she did nothing but held his face soft and tender, caring.
It was like the most ridiculous and bitter scene of his life, and he couldn’t believe that after everything happened he ended up having Kristin over at his place like that again. It was the joke of the year. “Kristin, don’t make it harder.” He asked, bitter. But her words were too strong, her presence too intense to ignore. Finally, he opened his eyes, feeling instantly worse just because she looked so damn criminally beautiful. “Please, really. You make no sense. I ask you to leave and daze your boyfriend with your presence instead of me.”
“You already made this harder.” She muttered. “You told me you loved me.” Kris pointed out before breathing in sharply as he finally looked at her. “I told you I loved you in return and Joe, I do.” Her lips twitched a little, daring to push up into a smile at him. Falling silent for a quick moment she moved forward to rest her forward against his, her hands dropping from his jaw to craddle his neck. “The last time I saw you..before last night.” She paused, licking along her lips. “You yelled at me and told me you hated me..we didn’t get closure.” They honestly hadn’t. Maybe that was why tonight, this whole meeting was so intense.
Some call love a curse, some call love a thief | Koe
“God, let me live.” He yelled back, falling on the couch and closing his eyes. He really, honestly fucking wanted her to leave and stop making it worse. Because every sacred moment they spent together made it harder to let go of her and hella sure he wasn’t going for another heartache, to ruin his whole self one more time. No, just fucking no, he had enough of that, he wasn’t masochistic. Or maybe that was it, maybe he was, maybe that was the reason he felt like fucking everything up.
Before he could’ve realized she wouldn’t leave she was already next to him, grabbing his hand and he just wanted to pull away and get as far as he could, because even her touch made him feel like paradise, with the most poisonous effect he ever could’ve imagined. “Kristin, stop it.” He said, dedicated not to open his eyes, so childish. But her eyes were off limits, those those blue orbs could put a spell on him in no time. “We’re over, it’s over, it does not work, we are not in love, how many times do you wanna kick me? I’m already on that floor. Leave.”
“No.” She insisted, falling beside him and keeping her hand on his, clutching him. “You called me for a reason, don’t take that back..you can’t.” She breathed out in a huff. “You can’t call me and tell me that you love me and then hang up on me, Joseph. You CAN’T.” They were over, yes she was very aware of that fact. “Believe it or fucking not, Joseph. You’re not the only one that got hurt. ” She snarled before removing her hand only to place her hand upon his face and doing the same with her other, turning his head to her, even if he wouldn’t open his eyes. Speaking of which. “Look at me, talk to me..and I’ll leave.” She muttered, thumbs stroking the skin of his jawline. “Please.”
(Source: vikingandqueen)
Some call love a curse, some call love a thief | Koe
He was between the sing along and the stripping level of drunkness, feeling good but far from being actually drunk, however delirious enough to not to give a flying fuck about anything. He was messed, he fancied too many girls and could only love too less. His job was fine, nice car, hot body, comfy house, beloved pet, dirty fame, handful of luck but without being loved it didn’t mean much.
“Whatever…” He muttered to himself, putting down Jim on the coffe table, dedicated to take off his casual shit and jeans so he moved upstairs, dropping every of his clothing until he got fully naked, then took sweat pants and put them on, leaving his upper body shirtless. With that he nodded to himself, moving back downstairs to continue his loner party, not knowing how much time has passed since he hung up on Kristin.
He should’ve. The noise of the door slamming made him jump up from the couch, frowning when he heard his name called. He must’ve been too drunk if he honestly thought Kristin was there, however he walked towards the source of those beautiful voice and he actually felt shocked when he got to see her standing there in the hall. He thought he took the spare key back, she must’ve used the one in the fake pot. He just stood there, staring at her beautiful form then slowly crossed his arms in front of his chest. “You shouldn’t be here, Kristin.” He muttered, turning his back and moving back to the living room, dropping the last words by talking over his shoulder. “I’ve got nothing to say, please leave.”
“Joseph!” She screamed again, ready to do so when she finally lay eyes on him. He had been drinking, jesus christ. Her eyes instantly fell to the band of his waist band, exactly where it connected with his skin. His perfectly sculpted skin. Fuck. “You shouldn’t have hung up on me.” She shot back, instantly pushing forward towards the living room where he disappeared to. She knew the house like the back of her hand. Knew Joes habits. Everything. Near growling under her breath she stomped towards the living room, tossing her keys and jacket on the floor before bounding over to him, instantly grabbing his hand. Surprisingly, there was no hesitation in her, even with their touch, even with how she suddenly ached to be with him just from a simple skin to skin touch. “I’m not leaving, Joseph.” Funny how only fifteen minutes ago he was telling her that he loved her and she was calling him baby.
Some call love a curse, some call love a thief | Koe
After Beth left he didn’t have the strength anymore to ignore everything and he happened to make a huge mistake by calling Kristin. His whole life was a bullshit and that call made him remember quite much. It was all pointless, however or whoever he loved something ruined it, didn’t matter what, he had the most interesting ways to have a relationship messed up.
After he hung up he just sat on the couch in silence, staring in front of himself for long minutes. Now what, idiot? “Now, Jim.” He muttered with a dedicated nod, then stood and walked over his own beloved booze cabinet, taking out a bottle of Jim Beam, opening it and taking a huge gulp straight from the bottle. He pressed play in his iPod and moved back to the couch, lying down and staring at the ceiling, occasionally taking a few sips of the whisky. He was planning on letting his favourite songs and the intoxication take over control.
Kristin needed to get to Joe. She needed to continue their discussion, she had to. They needed proper closure, proper everything. This wasn’t a dream and this was real. They needed to finish this, they had to. They both deserved it. “Fucking cunt sucking cunt.” Kristin screamed through the house, before tossing her phone against a wall. It broke instantly, she didn’t even care. Instead? She darted for her keys, grabbing them without hesitation and leaving her house and getting into the car before heading out to Joes place without reason. She knew what she had to do. It had to be done now, HAD to. Needed to.
She got there within fifteen minutes, her car parking on the street before she literally jumped out of her car, slammed the door shut and all but ran to the front door. Her fist curled and she hesitated, dropping it quickly. Turning on her heel she moved to the little row of flower pots beside the front wall. She bent to the third, picking up the fake pot and grabbing the spare key.”Thank you.” She muttered. He hadn’t moved it. He probably should have.
She didn’t even hesitate to move to the door, push the key into the lock and open the door, instantly stepping forward and into the house, slamming the door behind her. “JOSEPH.”
(Source: vikingandqueen)
"if you love me let me know, if you dont then let me go"
(Source: tw1nki)
